Tuesday Feb 23 2010

I know what I want to do but I just have to decide what to focus on right now. I have begun looking for film and/ or television work anywhere. I would not be able to take it, of course, unless the job would provide transportation and other important things. Before this week I did not consider this because I had given up on working in those fields until the end of last year. It was this week that I realized that the best thing to do is to expand where I search for jobs. I mean I am not going to expand the types of jobs since I have more confidence in myself than anyone except my mom. I want to finish the TV script that I have been writing and I want to work on the idea for the Script contest (Film), and I want to search for jobs. But what do I do now? That is one thing I have to figure out on my own. I do not think I will go anywhere tonight. I might go to IHOP for the free pancakes but I really doubt that since it would be so far to walk and it’s only pacakes. My new shoes are here and I think they are great. I will not wear them when it is wet outside. I will wear them only when I am going to somewhere important. SO, not often. I am so sick of some people asking me how my job search is going. It’s one person that annoys me everytime I see him. Retail? He can go work retail, but then again they would not hire him. He’s interesting at times to talk to but he seems somewhat off… I am more willing to move back to Los Angeles now… I mean this place is terrible. I am bored most of the time. I miss living in a city. I miss being able to take the city bus to a free movie screening most nights of the week and working some if not often. I am certain that people would have reasons for me not to move back to Los Angeles and I can think of one big reason, but I will not allow people to get in my way. I will not allow people to get me to think less of my self. I have had enough of people saying that reaching for your dreams is a bad thing when they have theirs. I am annoyed by “church” people who are not poor who say that you should be happy where you are, when they are so miserable despite where they are. I read a paper that was sent to me about the tithe. I will never pay a tithe unless I agree with where the money is being spent. I do want to be a good steward. What I want to do for a living? I want to write for television, maybe film as well. I also want to be a photographer I would not be opposed to acting. I would also be open to directing, editnig, cinematographer, camera operator… I have studied for about six years film and video production and photography and writing. It annoys me when someone who received a degree at home in photography thinks he is better than me. It also annoys me when people think that I am not good enough to do more than retail or fast food. I don’t care where you think I should be and don’t try to say it’s where God would have me be or some lame reason like that. I am going to try to focus and plan my day…

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